faith in things unseen

I just need to remember this when I have too much on my mind: I have faith in God... and God has faith in me.

No matter past cicumstances. No matter the judgements of others. Even when all other lights fade, even as friends come and go. Even as seasons change, and strength is challenged. Even when forgiveness is denied to the genuinely transformed heart. Even when forgiveness must be awarded to the undeserving and unrepenting. God is still the very same.

Even when doubt seems to grip every thought in every corner of my mind. God has faith in me. Even when I stress and worry when I know I shouldn't. God has faith in me.
Even when I hear whispers of failure that make me think twice. God has faith in me.

"Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. 'You have so little faith,' Jesus said. 'Why did you doubt me?'"

And when God is for me, who can be against me? Even when I don't think I can make it, He knows that I can.

In my weakness, His power is made all the more obvious.
In my insecurity, His stability is undeniable.
In my doubt, his clarity is defined and prominent.



//



I have just had so much on my mind lately... I can't help but to realize all the friends I have lost in the past few years. It breaks my heart. And for the longest time, I blamed myself because I have always had somewhat of a reclusive personality. But you know what... I may be reserved to a point, and I may not always talk first... but I always respond, and I am always there if I think I am needed in the least. I can't blame myslef entirely for lost friendships, it's just a part of life.

And of course, it's always hurtful when something said behind your back makes it back around to your ears. But then I am reminded that I am just as guilty of hurtful remarks as the next guy. I guess sometimes it's just a not so gentle reminder to filter your thoughts carefully before they come out of your mouth.
In some stituations, the only way for me to find peace about it is to learn from it myself... and what we choose to say has so much more power than we usually want to admitt.

makes me think of the whole "no one can tame the tongue" bit in james 3:3-12.

and a final thought...

"Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37

my metathesis

You know how sometimes, certian words have a tendency to hold more weight? they just kind of stick out more in your mind? Here lately, the word "new" has had, for some reason, an unusual amount of pull on my brain.

today I think I heard the final chapter of the "new" sermon series in my life that I've been catching peice by piece, in random conversations and situations. I went to a luncheon with my mom today, and the speaker touched breifly on the term "metathesis". It's like something just clicked. and so much unraveled in my mind.

Sometimes words are so much more than letters put together in a certain order. Words can trigger subconscious emotions, burried thoughts. Words can embody the uncontainable, release the imprisoned. Hearing one certain word can complete the puzzle of a vision in your mind, and then bam! suddenly something huge -some incomplete thought- suddely becomes clear and complete. The world slows down to match the beat of your drum, if only for a moment. and every star in the sky shines perfectly in its place.

I feel like I have had a metathesis. My mind simply does not operate the same way. My heart has a slightly different rhythm. My soul is the same (of course), but the window has changed... I am looking through a new window. I have changed.

Everyone changes. Through wind, rain, sunshine, and snow, the pressures of this life leave their traces. What we allow to be on the surface of us will shift and adapt, go through damage and repair the most. but I do believe that the core of someone will always remain the same. You can't base your discernment, expectation, or love for a person on anything other than that core. Futhermore, no soul can find a true counterpart by simply glancing at the embellishment of another soul. You have to see the very core.

I'm not afraid of change. Change is only natural, only human. God never changes! so who better to control changes in my life than the one who is unchanging?


"every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

"Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19

He makes all things NEW.

drumroll, please!

The anticipation...
can you feel it? : )

I feel like my entire life is in a "drumroll" stage right now.
I feel like everything is building up to something. Something big. This feeling is present in so many areas of my life right now. I even find it hard to sleep sometimes! Don't get me wrong, this is a positive feeling of apprehension... it just gives me this urge to keep my eyes open, and stay on my toes.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17

God never changes. He keeps a steady beat, just like the heart inside of me. He is constant, reliable, unwavering. Solid and unshakable.

His rhythm is the backbone to all the others, never changing.

And I feel like all these little drumrolls are going to collide soon, in this one huge explosion of lights, colors, and sound, to create the rhythm my life has always been destined to have. My lifesong in the making. It's a pretty cool feeling.

I just can't help but to think... "life is good." : )

little things.

Baby steps... that's how all great things start.
Crawl before you walk. Walk before you run.

Little things really are what matter most. Honestly, the little things in life are what make it worth living. Little things create true happiness. Long-lasting, genuine happiness. From the outside looking in, what seems to be an insignificant, run-of-the-mill moment... could mean the world to the soul that it warms. What seems to be worthless... just might be priceless.

And what seems to be a baby step might just be the biggest leap you have ever taken.

And isn't it amazing how one tiny event, one small coincidence, can alter so much from that moment on?

"a coincidence is just when God decides to remain anonymous."

Have you ever looked back on a moment and thought... "if that had not happened... my life would be completely different today." And its like a domino effect. The changes pile up and your life is suddenly developing in a totally new direction. Changing at an exponential rate.

Don't slam on the brakes. Just take a deep breath. And baby steps.
Focus on the little things. Build strong foundations. Get the small things right, and the big things will fall into place. The big picture will apear right before your eyes, because really the big picture is simply a collage of all the little things.

well... maybe not so simple. but beautiful, nonetheless. Beautiful because it is.